Welcome to the Talk Of The Week Club. I began this club as a way to share my love of learning and growing in the gospel of Jesus Christ through the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. My hope and desire is for you to learn and grow in your faith and love of the Savior, Jesus Christ. Each Thursday a new talk will be posted, come back, open your heart and mind, allow yourself to receive and I promise you will be spiritually fed.

Showing posts with label Marriage. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Marriage. Show all posts

Thursday, September 15, 2011

Week 37: Agency and Love in Marriage




Don't you just love it when someone sends you a message that contains exactly what YOU needed to hear? This past week a friend forwarded the following talk to me. It was wonderful to receive such a sweet message during a time when I needed answers. It was humbling however to recognize the things I need to do better to show Christ like love to my spouse and others. I hope you to will enjoy this message. If you are in need of further information on strengthening your marriage I recommend that you review the September 2011 Ensign magazine. It has many great articles on marriage and family.

Have a great week!


No Audio

Thursday, March 24, 2011

Week 12: Don't Leave for Tomorrow What You Can Do Today

Recently, my husband and I were blessed to attend an adult session of our Stake Conference. I say blessed because finding a babysitter for 6 children on a night when everyone else would also be needing a babysitter is a big feat. I entered into the stake building, and found a seat towards the very front of the chapel. There were many people in attendance and I wanted to make sure I heard every word that was spoken, grasped every small detail, and that I could truly feel the spirit as it whispered truth into my soul. Of course, I know that I didn't need to be right upfront to accomplish this, but somehow it made me focus harder and listen longer. Much of the conference focused on the family, on rearing children in righteousness, and bringing them up in truth and light. Basically, they pounded the principle that “Husband and wife have a solemn responsibility to love and care for each other and for their children.” (Family: A Proclamation to the World, 1995)


I took so many notes! I wrote down ideas as they came to me, little treasures that stood out to me in each talk, and quiet whisperings of the spirit.

I won't share all of my notes, that's a whole post all by itself, however a few of the most important things were:

"Being a mother is the highest calling I can have!!!!!!!!!" (Yes, I put that many exclamation points in my notes...)

Go forth with faith (maybe put a sign on the door that says this, so the kids see this it as they leave the house each day)<---this was a little bit of inspiration I received as I listened

Agency is not the right to do as we please but the right to do what is right

The home is the basis of righteous living.

I went home so filled with inspiration, with thoughts and ideas. I was filled to the brim with love for my children and love for the gospel. Then I got home. Somehow in the few short weeks since Stake Conference I've kind of forgotten the urgency I had to get home and put some of the thoughts I had into practice. I just keep putting of till tomorrow! To reinforce those thoughts, I decided to make the topic of my post this month, Family, more specifically raising children in light and truth and bringing our families to the gospel. I must have have read over a dozen talks trying to find just the right one to share with all of you, I finally chose the talk "Don't Leave for Tomorrow What You Can Do Today" given by Claudio R. M. Costa of the Seventy in the October 2007 General Conference. While the title of this talk may not sound like it's about family, it truly is. He explains the urgency we have to teach our children today, to offer acts of love and kindness to our family today because we never know what tomorrow might bring.






Read HERE




Thursday, January 13, 2011

Week 2: Fundamental To Our Faith

I recently read this weeks talk choice from the January 2011, Ensign Magazine. As I read the address given by Elder Dallin H. Oaks to the faculty and students of Harvard Law School, I was amazed at his courage! I can't imagine speaking to those of our faith about this topic let alone try to educate very educated people about our beliefs.

What I loved most about this article was the simplicity of the message as well as the description of our beliefs. I  loved how he put everything in a way that would be easy to understand as well as easy for us to use in our conversations to those who want to know more about who we really are and what we really believe.

One of my most favorite lines is found in the section on "The Purpose of Mortal Life". It explains why families are so important to our religion. I have personally grown in understanding and testimony of the importance of a complete family, meaning a mother, father and the children during the past six months as we have had the unique opportunity to help a child without this blessing. I even wondered why I was feeling so passionate about my newly developed testimony. This line helped me to understand what I was feeling as a truth of the Lord's plan of happiness.
We look on the bearing and nurturing of children as part of God’s plan and a sacred duty of those given the power to participate in it. We believe that the ultimate treasures on earth and in heaven are our children and our posterity. And we believe that we must contend for the kind of mortal families that provide the best conditions for the development and happiness of children—all children.
Notice how it says "we must contend" for this kind of family? Elder Oaks also explains that this desire to have a family is extended to ALL children. Knowing and understanding this truth has given me a greater desire to have a close mortal family as well as a challenge to look for those whom we could help. I know that with prayerful consideration the Lord will guide us to those whom we can help as well as ways to help them. 

Lastly the Ensign gives a challenge that I think is worth taking. We are challenged to share this article with those who could benefit.  From the link I share below you will be taken to the site of the article. There is an easy way to share just by clicking on the "share" button.

May your week be abundantly blessed!







....I have chosen three clusters of truths to present as fundamental premises of the faith of Latter-day Saints:

1. The nature of God, including the role of the three members of the Godhead and the corollary truth that there are moral absolutes.

2. The purpose of life.

3. The threefold sources of truth about man and the universe: science, the scriptures, and continuing revelation—and how we can know them......

Go HERE to read the entire article.


Thursday, July 1, 2010

Week 26: Honorably Hold a Name and Standing

Hello Friends,

This week's Talk of the Week is Elder Bednar's April 2009 Conference Talk "Honorably Hold a Name and Standing." ThisConference talk is one I frequently reflect on. What does it mean to honorably hold a name and standing? What does it mean to worship as we attend the temple? As I have pondered and sought teaching on these ideas, it has been interesting the insights that have come and the increase in love and appreciation for temples and for our Heavenly Father and our Savior. I love the words of Hymn 70 and the insights that have come as I have pondered and sung this wonderful hymn.

I am grateful for Elder Bednar's teaching about the significance of temples and the opportunities and blessings that come as we allow the "fire of the covenant" to burn within us. I am grateful for the protection and the power that come to us as we attend the temple and ponder on the covenants and blessings we receive there. I think there is much for us to understand about the protections and blessings that come that we do not yet grasp. At the BYU Women's Conference, Sister Beck counseled us to attend the temple more frequently and to PAY ATTENTION to who blessings are given by and what powers are given each of us. I have found it helpful to consider 3 Nephi 17:3 in light of temple attendance:

1/ Go unto your homes
2/ ponder
3/ ask—pray
4/ prepare minds for the morrow
5/ come again

I testify that great blessings come from committing to attend and attending the temple as frequently as we are able. I know that our abilities to complete necessary tasks and be more efficient with our time is a blessing that comes as we commit to attend the temple more often. I have increased patience and greater insights into the responsibilities and challenges I face as I increase my temple attendance. The temple is the place we can come to know the Savior better and understand more fully our relationship to Him. It truly is the House of the Lord. How grateful I am to be a witness of this marvelous season of accelerated temple building! It is magnificent to see the work of the Lord rolling forward in significant ways.

Much love,







Shortly after I was called to serve as a stake president in 1987, I talked with a good friend who recently had been released as a stake president. During our conversation I asked him what he would teach me about becoming an effective stake president. His answer to my question had a profound impact upon my subsequent service and ministry.

My friend indicated he had been called to serve as a temple worker soon after his release. He then said: “I wish I had been a temple worker before I was a stake president. If I had served in the temple before my call to serve as a stake president, I would have been a very different stake president.”

I was intrigued by his answer and asked him to explain further. He responded: “I believe I was a good stake president. The programs in our stake ran well, and our statistics were above average. But serving in the temple has expanded my vision. If I were called today to serve as a stake president, my primary focus would be on worthiness to receive and honor temple covenants. I would strive to make temple preparation the center of all that we did. I would do a better job of shepherding the Saints to the house of the Lord.”

That brief conversation with my friend helped me as a stake president to teach relentlessly about and testify of the eternal importance of temple ordinances, temple covenants, and temple worship. The deepest desire of our presidency was for every member of the stake to receive the blessings of the temple, to be worthy of and to use frequently a temple recommend.

My message today focuses upon the blessings of the temple, and I pray the Holy Ghost will illuminate our minds, penetrate our hearts, and bear witness of truth to each of us.

Read the rest HERE

Thursday, February 18, 2010

Week 7: More Dilligent and Concerned at Home



During last October's General Conference, I remember this talk so well. It touched my heart and encouraged me to work on three things as a parent and spouse; Express Love and Show It, Bear Testimony and Live It, Be Consistent. Since my first listening of this talk I have had a few great experiences where I have been able to see these three things in my family’s life. One example comes from my four year old. Lately she has been making it a point to tell me she loves me. Each day she comes up to me and asks, "Have I told you I love you today?". She then tells me she loves me and gives me a big hug. Some days I feel like her statement and act of love is all I've gotten that day! Not only does it make me feel so much better but it reminds me to reach out and to share my love with the rest of our family.
With our morning scripture reading there has been a few wonderful times when testimonies have been shared in a very natural way. It has been great to hear these testimonies, not just at the pulpit but in a quick meaningful moment within the walls of our own home.
As far as being consistent is concerned this is one we are consistently working on! Just the other night my six year old reminded me that we don't always say our evening prayers as a family. I then went on to admit to him that it is sometimes hard for me to remember and that I would appreciate his help. I love how Elder Bednar reflects on his own family experiences of the whining and grumbling but recalls that his adult sons remember more the consistently than the whining. When I heard him talk about his family I was relieved to hear that even an apostle of the Lord had children who complained. 
I hope that this quick reminder will put these things in the for front of our minds and helps us all to be a little better each day at expressing love and showing love, bearing testimony and living it, and striving for consistency.

Have a wonderful week!





MP3 Link




We can become more diligent and concerned at home as we are more faithful in learning, living, and loving the restored gospel of Jesus Christ.

In 1833 the Prophet Joseph Smith received a revelation that contained a strong rebuke to several leading brethren of the Church to set their families in order (see D&C 93:40–50). A specific phrase from this revelation provides the theme for my message—“more diligent and concerned at home” (verse 50). I want to suggest three ways each of us can become more diligent and concerned in our homes. I invite you to listen both with ears that hear and with hearts that feel, and I pray for the Spirit of the Lord to be with all of us.
Read the rest HERE


Thursday, February 11, 2010

Week 6: Temple Marriage: What can we learn from it?

 

I want to tell you about a person who has been such an inspiration and example to me, my grandpa Ivan Johnson. He is 93 years old, blind, and suffers from hearing loss. He goes to the St. George temple three days a week for 6 hours at a time. I asked him the other day why he does it and he told me, "I have nothing else to do." He then went on to say, "It [the temple] is a good place to be, a good place to be found." Then of course as only a wife can do my grandma Margaret reminded, "The Lord wants him to."  When I asked him what blessings he has received because of his service he told me two things, "[It has] Kept me out of mischief." and "The people have become like family." My Grandma also mentioned that a blessing she sees is that others remember his service and desire to do the same. Grandpa said that he feels all the people that have been helped and that with some imagination you can almost feel them rejoicing that their families are being brought together forever. To which grandma commented that it isn't imaginary it is real. My grandparents told me that they have been going to the temple at least once a week for over 65 years. And the last 6 years grandpa has been spending 18 hours a week there.

The picture above was taken on my last visit. Grandpa was waiting for his ride to the temple. I was impressed by his dedication and excitement to go. He was ready and waiting just as a child does when their friend is coming to play.  I thought about his example here and wondered do I have such a desire and excitement to serve in the Temple? How is it that this little old man can serve the Lord even though he suffers from many disabilities? If he can do it then why can't I, an able bodied, young woman dedicate my time to the Lord and serve in His house.

I wondered what keeps me from serving. A few years ago I thought that I had to give 2 hours at a time to do an Endowment Session. It wasn't until a year and a half ago when my youngest child started preschool that I decided to follow my grandpa's example and go more often, that I realized I could do Sealing’s or Initiatory and stay for as long as I can. Another thing that has kept me from going to the temple in the past is not being able to schedule time to go with my spouse. Although it is ideal to serve together, if circumstances are difficult, I've come to learn that it is better to go alone than not at all. My grandma is not physically able to go with my grandpa but she serves by preparing his clothing and supporting him and his desire to serve. I believe that they are both blessed because of their desire to serve the Lord in the Temple.

I know that my family's life has been blessed by my service. I leave Sealing work with a greater love for my spouse and my children which in turn blesses my home with more peace as I am less tempted to yell or lose all my patience at once. I leave Initiatory with hope and courage to do what I am asked to do. I leave Endowment sessions with a sense of who I am and a great, loving testimony for the Savior and His atonement. I do not think I even know half of the blessings that are given to me for serving. I do it because I have watched a valiant man and his precious wife dedicate their lives to the Lord. I do it because I have gained my own testimony of the importance of temple work. I do it because the Lord wants me to.

I am not an ordained minister, nor do have any authority to exhort or command. I do know from personal experience however that going to the temple whether you understand it or not blesses lives. Spiritual knowledge is gained, peace is given, strength and courage are restored. A love of God and of family is obtained and secured in one's heart with faithful and consistent service in the Temple's of God the Eternal Father and the Savior Jesus Christ.  If I could I would plead and beg you all to just go. Do not wait until you are old and have nothing else to do. Do not wait until all your questions are answered. Go now, you need it now, your families need it now, your children and future children need it now. Please go to the Temple.

I chose the talk this week because it went t into really good detail of why we go to the temple. I hope you will enjoy it and that you will gain a testimony for yourself by attending the temple regularly.

All my hope and love,







No Text this week


Listen to Audio HERE
View Video HERE

Thursday, January 28, 2010

Week 4: The Family: A Proclamation to the World


I bet that at this very moment you have a "Family Proclamation" hanging on your wall. In your living room, family room, dining room, maybe even your bathroom. The Family: A Proclamation to the World was given to us by the First Presidency of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints and read by President Gordon B. Hinckley at the General Relief Soceity meeting in September 1995. It's message isn't just for the members of the church but as stated in it's title is is a proclamation for ALL THE WORLD.

Earlier this month my four-year old asked me why we had it on our wall, what it meant, was it about Jesus, where did we get the frame, who gave it to us, can we read it......and the list of questions went on. I realized in that moment that I really hadn't taken the time to familiarize myself with it's message and that although I had read it many times I really had never READ it. Sure I knew all the key points and could rattle off typically used phrases but I really, really never studied it the way scripture should be studied. This month I decided to truly study and dissect it. I realized this was something that my family really had been needing. It helped me reaffirm my meaning here as a daughter of heavenly parent and understand my duties and my goals as a mother. It reminded me how important covenants and ordinances are, and that the road to happiness in our families is through our Savior Jesus Christ. How often do we pass by the Proclamation on our wall and not even think about the beautiful truths and promises that are contained therein?

Directly before giving us the proclamation President Hinckley made a statement regarding the reason why such a Proclamation was generated. He said, "With so much of sophistry that is passed off as truth, with so much of deception concerning standards and values, with so much of allurement and enticement to take on the slow stain of the world, we have felt to warn and forewarn. In furtherance of this we of the First Presidency and the Council of the Twelve Apostles now issue a proclamation to the Church and to the world as a declaration and reaffirmation of standards, doctrines, and practices relative to the family which the prophets, seers, and revelators of this church have repeatedly stated throughout its history."

I felt deeply inspired to choose THE FAMILY: A PROCLAMATION TO THE WORLD, as my my first Talk of the Week for the new year. I hope that as you listen to it and maybe even follow along with that poster on your wall (you know,the one in the beautiful frame), that you will feel impressed and inspired to "maintain and strengthen" your family.






Thursday, January 14, 2010

Week 2: Seven Days to a Better Marriage





As part of the New Year it is customary to make goals and plan for the future. When I came across this talk I thought it was a perfect fit because it is something I think we all desire, ways to better our most important relationships, plus it was something that could be done FAST!!! I must admit I listened to this a few weeks ago and have found such strength and hope from the stories and in sight Brother Barlow shares. I hope you too will enjoy his lighthearted, speedy remedy to improving the sacred relationship of marriage.

Because there is not a transcript of this talk I have made up a worksheet showing the key principles and an action challenge for each one. I hope you will take the time either with your spouse on your own to complete the actions. I know that anyone who takes the challenge will see a better marriage and self in seven days or less.

May we all be blessed to take care of this most important aspect of our earthly and eternal lives.

All my love,







MP3 Link




Thursday, November 5, 2009

Week 45: Mother's Who Know

Dear Friends,

As I pondered this week's talk, President Julie Beck's "Mothers Who Know" from the October 2007 General Conference kept coming to mind. As I had the privilege to hear President Beck speak not too long ago, the Spirit bore witness to me that she is indeed the one raised up by the Lord to direct us at this time. I was enlightened and encouraged by her insights, her enthusiasm, and her clarity of vision. I was filled with gratitude that she has been prepared "for such a time as this" to lead and direct us. "Mothers Who Know" gives us powerful and clear insights for our roles as mothers. I am grateful for President Beck's simple and detailed direction for how we can optimize our influences as mothers. I am grateful for the sweet privilege of being a mother in Israel during the winding up scenes. I know that what you and I do daily in our homes is truly on the front lines of the battle we are winning. Our living of the Gospel in our homes is essential for the exaltation of our children and ourselves. Our homes are where our influence is most needed and most profoundly felt. May you feel empowered by the Lord as you do His work in your home.

Much love,






MP3 Link




There is eternal influence and power in motherhood.

Julie B. BeckIn the Book of Mormon we read about 2,000 exemplary young men who were exceedingly valiant, courageous, and strong. "Yea, they were men of truth and soberness, for they had been taught to keep the commandments of God and to walk uprightly before him" (Alma 53:21). These faithful young men paid tribute to their mothers. They said, "Our mothers knew it" (Alma 56:48). I would suspect that the mothers of Captain Moroni, Mosiah, Mormon, and other great leaders also knew.

The responsibility mothers have today has never required more vigilance. More than at any time in the history of the world, we need mothers who know. Children are being born into a world where they "wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places" (Ephesians 6:12).1 However, mothers need not fear. When mothers know who they are and who God is and have made covenants with Him, they will have great power and influence for good on their children.

Mothers Who Know Bear Children

Mothers who know desire to bear children. Whereas in many cultures in the world children are "becoming less valued,"2 in the culture of the gospel we still believe in having children. Prophets, seers, and revelators who were sustained at this conference have declared that "God's commandment for His children to multiply and replenish the earth remains in force."3 President Ezra Taft Benson taught that young couples should not postpone having children and that "in the eternal perspective, children—not possessions, not position, not prestige—are our greatest jewels."4

Faithful daughters of God desire children. In the scriptures we read of Eve (see Moses 4:26), Sarah (see Genesis 17:16), Rebekah (see Genesis 24:60), and Mary (see 1 Nephi 11:13–20), who were foreordained to be mothers before children were born to them. Some women are not given the responsibility of bearing children in mortality, but just as Hannah of the Old Testament prayed fervently for her child (see 1 Samuel 1:11), the value women place on motherhood in this life and the attributes of motherhood they attain here will rise with them in the Resurrection (see D&C 130:18). Women who desire and work toward that blessing in this life are promised they will receive it for all eternity, and eternity is much, much longer than mortality. There is eternal influence and power in motherhood.

Mothers Who Know Honor Sacred Ordinances and Covenants

Mothers who know honor sacred ordinances and covenants. I have visited sacrament meetings in some of the poorest places on the earth where mothers have dressed with great care in their Sunday best despite walking for miles on dusty streets and using worn-out public transportation. They bring daughters in clean and ironed dresses with hair brushed to perfection; their sons wear white shirts and ties and have missionary haircuts. These mothers know they are going to sacrament meeting, where covenants are renewed. These mothers have made and honor temple covenants. They know that if they are not pointing their children to the temple, they are not pointing them toward desired eternal goals. These mothers have influence and power.

Mothers Who Know Are Nurturers

Mothers who know are nurturers. This is their special assignment and role under the plan of happiness.5 To nurture means to cultivate, care for, and make grow. Therefore, mothers who know create a climate for spiritual and temporal growth in their homes. Another word for nurturing is homemaking. Homemaking includes cooking, washing clothes and dishes, and keeping an orderly home. Home is where women have the most power and influence; therefore, Latter-day Saint women should be the best homemakers in the world. Working beside children in homemaking tasks creates opportunities to teach and model qualities children should emulate. Nurturing mothers are knowledgeable, but all the education women attain will avail them nothing if they do not have the skill to make a home that creates a climate for spiritual growth. Growth happens best in a "house of order," and women should pattern their homes after the Lord's house (see D&C 109). Nurturing requires organization, patience, love, and work. Helping growth occur through nurturing is truly a powerful and influential role bestowed on women.

Mothers Who Know Are Leaders

Mothers who know are leaders. In equal partnership with their husbands, they lead a great and eternal organization. These mothers plan for the future of their organization. They plan for missions, temple marriages, and education. They plan for prayer, scripture study, and family home evening. Mothers who know build children into future leaders and are the primary examples of what leaders look like. They do not abandon their plan by succumbing to social pressure and worldly models of parenting. These wise mothers who know are selective about their own activities and involvement to conserve their limited strength in order to maximize their influence where it matters most.

Mothers Who Know Are Teachers

Mothers who know are always teachers. Since they are not babysitters, they are never off duty. A well-taught friend told me that he did not learn anything at church that he had not already learned at home. His parents used family scripture study, prayer, family home evening, mealtimes, and other gatherings to teach. Think of the power of our future missionary force if mothers considered their homes as a pre–missionary training center. Then the doctrines of the gospel taught in the MTC would be a review and not a revelation. That is influence; that is power.

Mothers Who Know Do Less

Mothers who know do less. They permit less of what will not bear good fruit eternally. They allow less media in their homes, less distraction, less activity that draws their children away from their home. Mothers who know are willing to live on less and consume less of the world's goods in order to spend more time with their children—more time eating together, more time working together, more time reading together, more time talking, laughing, singing, and exemplifying. These mothers choose carefully and do not try to choose it all. Their goal is to prepare a rising generation of children who will take the gospel of Jesus Christ into the entire world. Their goal is to prepare future fathers and mothers who will be builders of the Lord's kingdom for the next 50 years. That is influence; that is power.

Mothers Who Know Stand Strong and Immovable

Who will prepare this righteous generation of sons and daughters? Latter-day Saint women will do this—women who know and love the Lord and bear testimony of Him, women who are strong and immovable and who do not give up during difficult and discouraging times. We are led by an inspired prophet of God who has called upon the women of the Church to "stand strong and immovable for that which is correct and proper under the plan of the Lord."6 He has asked us to "begin in [our] own homes"7 to teach children the ways of truth.

Latter-day Saint women should be the very best in the world at upholding, nurturing, and protecting families. I have every confidence that our women will do this and will come to be known as mothers who "knew" (Alma 56:48). In the name of Jesus Christ, amen.


NOTES
1. See Gordon B. Hinckley, "Standing Strong and Immovable," Worldwide Leadership Training Meeting, Jan. 10, 2004, 21.
2. James E. Faust, "Challenges Facing the Family," Worldwide Leadership Training Meeting, Jan. 10, 2004, 2.
3. "The Family: A Proclamation to the World," Liahona, Oct. 2004, 49; Ensign, Nov. 1995, 102.
4. To the Mothers in Zion (pamphlet, 1987), 3.
5. See "The Family: A Proclamation to the World."
6. Gordon B. Hinckley, Worldwide Leadership Training Meeting, Jan. 10, 2004, 20.
7. Gordon B. Hinckley, Worldwide Leadership Training Meeting, Jan. 10, 2004, 20.



Thursday, October 22, 2009

Week 43: Come What May and Love It

I love the advice Elder Joseph B. Worthlin's mother gave to him when dealing with adversity, "Come what may, and love it!" If you've read or received the Talk of the Week for some time you may have realized that I am constantly seeking to improve my home life, my family, and myself. It's a common thread that flows through each of my monthly postings. Often when faced with adversity, or when I am discouraged I tend to be disheartened, saddened, and I fail to remember that we are here to be tried and tested. We ARE here to grow and learn. Elder Worthlin says, "If we approach adversities wisely, our hardest times can be times of greatest growth." We need to remember to make the best of any situation thrown at us, come what may.....and LOVE IT.










MP3 Link of entire talk

To read the full message as given click here

Thursday, June 25, 2009

Week 26: The Importance of Families

My husband and I have 5 beautiful children ages 9, 8, 6, 3, and 14 months. As you can imagine our home is quite noisy and at time chaos abounds, as does happiness. For the most part I have wonderful obedient children. FOR. THE. MOST. PART. Like any family (atleast I hope it's not just me) we have seen our ups and downs, our tantrums, our little disobedience's and white lies. Each time I think...What am I doing wrong? Is there a book to fix that behavior? Is there a class we can take? Is there something on the internet?? Did Dr. Phil do an episode on this? Why are they doing that? WHAT AM I DOING WRONG?!?!?!?!?

Sometimes I get so caught up with what the "Dr. Phil's" of the world have to say that I forget that the answers are right here. Readily accessible. It doesn't require "Google" it just requires my faithful diligence to Lord and his gospel. Time and time again I realize when our family gets "out of balance" or when it seems like I am putting out fires to the left and to the right of me, something is lacking. It is then that I do a personal checklist...

Are we having Family Home Evening?

Are we praying together as a family...other than at meal time?

Are we searching the scriptures together?

I know it is often hard to be diligent to these basic counsels given to us by the Prophet...believe me I know...did I mention I have 5 children under the age of 9? After reading the talk "THE IMPORTANCE OF FAMILY" given by Elder L. Tom Perry it reiterated what I already knew, "building a gospel-centered home creates a safe harbor from the storms of the adversary" and it's a great way to nip those naughty behaviors in the bud! :)


The Importance of the Family
Elder L. Tom Perry Of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles
May it be our resolve this year to build a gospel-centered home, a safe harbor from the storms of the adversary.

In a world of turmoil and uncertainty, it is more important than ever to make our families the center of our lives and the top of our priorities. Families lie at the center of our Heavenly Father's plan. This statement from "The Family: A Proclamation to the World" declares the responsibilities of parents to their families:
"Husband and wife have a solemn responsibility to love and care for each other and for their children. 'Children are an heritage of the Lord' (Psalms 127:3). Parents have a sacred duty to rear their children in love and righteousness, to provide for their physical and spiritual needs, to teach them to love and serve one another, to observe the commandments of God and to be law-abiding citizens wherever they live. Husbands and wives—mothers and fathers—will be held accountable before God for the discharge of these obligations."1
In recent meetings with the First Presidency, they have expressed concern about the deterioration of the family. Their mandate to the Priesthood Executive Council was to concentrate on the family in our assignments.
In response to the First Presidency, many plans and efforts are already in place. We will use all of the resources we have to encourage greater harmony, greater love, and greater influence in the Lord's special designated unit—the family.
We need to make our homes a place of refuge from the storm, which is increasing in intensity all about us. Even if the smallest openings are left unattended, negative influences can penetrate the very walls of our homes. Let me cite an example.
Several years ago, I was having dinner with my daughter and her family. The scene is all too common in most homes with small children. My daughter was trying to encourage her young, three-year-old son to eat a balanced meal. He had eaten all the food on his plate that he liked. A small serving of green beans remained, which he was not fond of. In desperation, the mother picked up a fork and tried to encourage him to eat his beans. He tolerated it just about as long as he could. Then he exclaimed, "Look, Mom, don't foul up a good friendship!"
Those were the exact words he heard on a television commercial a few days earlier. Oh, what impact advertising, television programs, the Internet, and the other media are having on our family units!
We remind you that parents are to preside over their own families.
Helps and reminders will come from the Church Internet site and television channels, as well as through priesthood and auxiliary leadership to assist you as we strive to fulfill our family responsibilities.
In some of the zones of the world, we have an alternative to commercial television networks and some of their antifamily programming. We have BYU Television, which presents family-oriented programs. In addition to programs that bring gospel teaching, there are programs directed to parent instruction and family entertainment. We will also be striving to increase the quality and frequency of our family-centered Homefront public service spots.
We have other helps, covering a wider area than the television network: we have the Church Web site, lds.org. It has recently been updated to include a new home and family page. The page includes thoughts from the scriptures and Church leaders to strengthen the family. It also includes ideas for family activities. A new home and family section provides:
Teachings from Church leaders specifically for the family.
Ideas for family activities.
Family home evening quick tips to help you have meaningful and enjoyable family home evenings.
Featured articles on topics such as making family home evenings more successful, strengthening the relationship between husband and wife, and ideas for feeling closer as family members.
As the site is updated, additional ideas for planning family home evenings will appear. One of these will offer suggestions for activities for Faith in God, Duty to God, and Personal Progress programs.
We do have one media source, however, that reaches the entire Church—it is our wonderful Church magazines. These magazines come into our homes regularly and are another way of delivering information to help strengthen the family. Perhaps you noticed in the March Ensign and Liahona, the international magazine—a message from President Gordon B. Hinckley on family home evenings:
" 'We have a family home evening program once a week [Monday night] across the Church in which parents sit down with their children. They study the scriptures. They talk about family problems. They plan family activities and things of that kind. I don't hesitate to say if every family in the world practiced that one thing, you'd see a very great difference in the solidarity of the families of the world' (interview, Boston Globe, 14 Aug. 2000)."2
Following President Hinckley's encouragement for us to hold family home evenings, the next article in the Ensign was entitled "The Calling I Didn't Know I Had":
"Family home evening was challenging when our children were young. My husband and I took seriously the latter-day prophets' counsel to hold regular family home evenings, but between our Church callings and other responsibilities, we too often found there wasn't time or energy to plan an effective, loving family home evening when Monday night came around.
"While visiting Primary one Sunday I noticed how captivated the children were by the stories, visual aids, and brief but effective activities planned for sharing time and music time. I was also absorbed in learning from the well-prepared efforts the Primary counselor and music leader put into their callings. 'They obviously spent adequate time mingled with lots of love,' I thought. 'They do wonderful things in their callings.'
"Just then a thought came to mind: 'Family home evening is one of your callings. In fact, it is part of your most important calling—motherhood!' I reflected on that insight. 'If I can make the time to magnify my callings as newsletter editor and visiting teacher, I can surely magnify my family home evening calling.' "3
What a wonderful thought she has brought to us to encourage us to be more effective in our planning for this special night set aside for the family.
We can also alert you to the fact that our June issues of the Church magazines will be dedicated to a family theme. In addition, throughout the year there will be issues of the Liahona, Ensign, New Era, and Friend containing materials for teaching in the home. There will be wonderful suggestions for family home evenings and ideas for everyday teaching moments. The articles are written so they can easily be adapted for lessons for your family.
Children and youth are shown, through prophetic words and through living examples, the importance of loving and honoring their parents. Parents are taught ways of building and maintaining close family ties, both in good times and in difficult times. The good spirit in these magazines will help fill your homes with warmth, love, and the strength of the gospel.
The Church News is also helping to spread the message of the family. It has articles on strengthening love and respect in the home, putting the gospel in action, and planning wholesome recreation.
We hope that by flooding the Church with family-oriented media, members of the Church will be assisted and encouraged to build stronger and better families. We hope it will cause a conscious and sustained effort in building an eternal family unit. An abundance of Church materials will be available for you from which to pick and choose useful ideas. At least by seeing family issues mentioned so often, we all will be reminded to focus our attention on the most important organization the Lord has established here on earth.
From the very beginning the Lord has established the importance of the family organization for us. Soon after Adam and Eve left the Garden of Eden, the Lord spoke to them:
"The Holy Ghost fell upon Adam, [and] beareth record of the Father and the Son. . . .
"[Then] in that day Adam blessed God and was filled, and began to prophesy concerning all the families of the earth, saying: Blessed be the name of God, for because of my transgression my eyes are opened, and in this life I shall have joy, and again in the flesh I shall see God.
"And Eve, his wife, heard all these things and was glad, saying: [If it were] not for our transgression we never should have had seed, and never should have known good and evil, and the joy of our redemption, and the eternal life which God giveth unto all the obedient.
"And Adam and Eve blessed the name of God, and they made all things known unto their sons and their daughters."4
"President Brigham Young explained that our families are not yet ours. The Lord has committed them to us to see how we will treat them. Only if we are faithful will they be given to us forever. What we do on earth determines whether or not we will be worthy to become heavenly parents."5
The Church has established two special times for families to be together. The first is centered around the proper observance of the Sabbath day. This is the time we are to attend our regular meetings together, study the life and teachings of the Savior and of the prophets. "Other appropriate Sunday activities include (1) writing personal and family journals, (2) holding family councils, (3) establishing and maintaining family organizations for the immediate and extended family, (4) personal interviews between parents and children, (5) writing to relatives and missionaries, (6) genealogy, (7) visiting relatives and those who are ill or lonely, (8) missionary work, (9) reading stories to children, and (10) singing Church hymns."6
The second time is Monday night. We are to teach our children in a well-organized, regular family home evening. No other activities should involve our family members on Monday night. This designated time is to be with our families.
We hope all of you have noticed the special emphasis the First Presidency has put on family home evenings. The First Presidency letter of October 4, 1999, was recently repeated in the magazines:
"To: Members of the Church throughout the World
"Dear Brothers and Sisters:
"Monday nights are reserved throughout the Church for family home evenings. We encourage members to set aside this time to strengthen family ties and teach the gospel in their homes.
"Earlier this year we called on parents to devote their best efforts to the teaching and rearing of their children in gospel principles which will keep them close to the Church. We also counseled parents and children to give highest priority to family prayer, family home evening, gospel study and instruction, and wholesome family activities.
"We urge members, where possible, to avoid holding receptions or other similar activities on Monday evenings. Where practical, members may also want to encourage community and school leaders to avoid scheduling activities on Monday evenings that require children or parents to be away from their homes.
"Church buildings and facilities should be closed on Monday evenings. No ward or stake activities should be planned, and other interruptions to family home evenings should be avoided."7
May it be our resolve this year to build a gospel-centered home, a safe harbor from the storms of the adversary. Let us again remember the promises and instructions from the Lord to His children:
"The glory of God is intelligence, or, in other words, light and truth.
"Light and truth forsake that evil one. . . .
"And that wicked one cometh and taketh away light and truth, through disobedience, from the children of men, and because of the tradition of their fathers.
"But I have commanded you to bring up your children in light and truth."8
May this be our year for enjoying the light and truth of the gospel in our homes. May our homes truly become places of refuge from the world is my humble prayer in the name of Jesus Christ, amen.
NOTES
1. Ensign, Nov. 1995, 102; Liahona, Oct. 1998, 24.2. "Family Home Evening," Ensign, Mar. 2003, 3; Liahona, Mar. 2003, 3.3. Jan Whitley Hansen, "The Calling I Didn't Know I Had," Ensign, Mar. 2003, 6.4. See Moses 5:4–5, 9–12.5. Gospel Principles [manual, 1997], 231.6. "Suggestions for Individual and Family Sabbath-Day Activities," Ensign, Mar. 1980, 76.7. Ensign, Mar. 2003, 4; Liahona, Mar. 2003, 4.8. D&C 93:36–37, 39–40.

Thursday, November 13, 2008

Week 43: Being Missionary to Your Spouse

This talk was sent to me a few weeks ago.(Thanks Rebecca!) I loved it and felt that it held many answers to what I was seeking.

I have been asking Heavenly Father to help me understand the great changes he has required of me over the past few years. I wondered what it was that I was supposed to learn. One of the greatest answers for me has been the word Unity. I have felt that our families' recent moves have been provided to teach us unity. Unity as a family, as husband and wife, unity with God and the Savior. Trusting in their time, their love, their wisdom. Becoming one with them as we rely on them to get us through the challenges and changes.

I hope you will find the answers you seek. I know that as you unify yourself in love and gratitude with the Savior and our Heavenly Father you will be given answers when you need them most. I know that the principles of love, patience, long suffering and free agency bring unity to our lives as spouses, family members, church members, and members of society.

Have a blessed week,

Shauntell

NO MP3 this week


Being Missionary to Your Spouse
By Mollie H. Sorensen
Ensign, Sep 1983, 58
“By Gentleness and Love Unfeigned …”

Unspeakable joy came over me as my husband walked to the stand to be sustained second counselor in the stake presidency. As he bore his testimony of his love for the Savior and of the gospel, he also gave thanks for his wife. I recalled the time I came home and found a poster tacked up on the dining room wall, proclaiming, “I love my wife because she has faith in me!”
It seemed not long ago that he emphatically announced, “They’d better not ever ask me to give a sacrament meeting talk, because that’s something I’ll never do.” He now is one of the favorite speakers in the stake.
I remembered, too, that my husband had said: “Just because you’re into dramatics, don’t think you can persuade me to be in a play. I’m just not an actor.” He was great in the lead part of a stake play.
“I’m not a reader,” he had insisted. Now he reads the scriptures faithfully every day and teaches them to all of us each morning.
“I don’t understand how to use the priesthood,” he once said. But since then he has blessed our family with the power of the priesthood on numerous occasions.
Yes, my husband has changed! Sixteen years ago he was a prospective elder.
What brought about this mighty change? For my sisters who stand in the perplexing situation of being missionary to their husbands, I would like to share a few insights. Since I speak from experience, I speak as a wife. But the principles could be used as well by a husband who has need of being missionary to his wife.
It is not easy to have faith in your spouse if he has disappointed you over and over. And for the woman who enjoys spiritual truths, it is frustrating not to be able to openly share them. Her desire to have her husband understand and appreciate the gospel becomes almost unbearable at times. And this is normal; for having achieved great joy, the natural consequence is to want to share it with loved ones.
But in these cases, a very delicate situation can arise. The man is the head of the house—the one who should lead, not be led. The woman, while being an equal partner in the marriage, should support and sustain her husband in his leadership role. But if he is not active or isn’t a member of the Church, she is placed in a very frustrating position. Often, if she wants Sabbath attendance, family home evenings, and other Church activities, she faces an inner battle and may even have open conflict with her husband—thus defeating her purpose to bring unity and spirituality into the home.
Where can a woman go for guidance and direction in her role as missionary to her husband? Great insights can be found through studying the scriptures. For example, I learned an important lesson when I studied about the council in heaven and the issues discussed there.
Satan proposed a plan of forcing everyone to obey the principles of their Father in Heaven. “I will redeem all mankind,” he said, “that one soul shall not be lost, and surely I will do it.”
But Heavenly Father did not want “to destroy the agency of man, which I, the Lord God, had given him.” Instead, he made available the plan of salvation through his Only Begotten Son, whereby we could enjoy freedom of choice. (See Moses 4:1–4.)
From this scriptural account we can conclude that trying to force another to accept the gospel is not pleasing to our Father. He cares not only that they return again to him, but also that they do so of their own free will and choice. He wants them to discover for themselves that the truths he has given are right and good and will bring the greatest joy. In order to do this, everyone needs to be free to experience and discover for himself.
Some true methods of exerting influence are listed in the Doctrine and Covenants:
“Only by persuasion, by long-suffering, by gentleness and meekness, and by love unfeigned;
“By kindness, and pure knowledge, which shall greatly enlarge the soul without hypocrisy, and without guile.” (D&C 121:41–42.)
These qualities, the Lord’s methods of persuasion, can become part of our very nature if we live worthy to obtain an endowment of his Spirit. I’ve learned that although a wife can encourage and be a light unto her husband, it is still the Spirit of the Lord that changes lives.
In Galatians 5:22–23 we find: “The fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, faith, meekness, temperance.” [Gal. 5:22–23]
There are those who would counsel wives to pretend to have these qualities of love, gentleness, and meekness in order to establish a better relationship with their husbands. But in this pretense or guile, they bypass the Savior, who condemned hypocrisy.
I have found that the very core of our being must be purged of its natural inclination to criticize and to lose faith. To do this, we must obtain greater power than we alone possess. Heavenly Father can give us this ability to change—to make a faultfinding, sour disposition sweet again, as a little child’s. “Create in me a clean heart, O God,” we might plead; “and renew a right spirit within me.” (Ps. 51:10.) He can bless us with the ability to see better, to uncover beautiful and lovable qualities of character in our spouses.
Although it may not be easy to love those who have disappointed us, we are promised that the Spirit can endow us with the power to love even those whose actions make them difficult to love:
“Wherefore, my beloved brethren, pray unto the Father with all the energy of heart, that ye may be filled with this love, which he hath bestowed upon all who are true followers of his Son, Jesus Christ.” (Moro. 7:48.)
One woman who attained this loving nature with the Spirit’s help expressed it in this way: “There was a time when I was so frustrated with what my husband wasn’t doing that I didn’t appreciate the good he was doing. I was hung up on the letter of the law and forgot the more important things, such as love, patience, forgiveness, and faith. I seemed obsessed with impatience for him to change.
“Then, somehow, I realized I was wrong. I knew my attitude towards my husband was without hope. I sought Heavenly Father for a change of heart, praying and fasting. Like a miracle, gradually my heart began to change. The more I felt the warmth of the Spirit in my life, the more I lost the compulsion to criticize. Not only that, but I was able to love and respect him in ways that I had overlooked before. I began deeply appreciating his patience with the children, his tolerance for others, his cheerful disposition, and his way of working with his hands—he could accomplish in one hour what many men would in half a day!
“Oh, of course I still wish he would become active in the Church, but I’ve gained a real tolerance for him to grow in his own way, and I pray that I will be the example of love that he needs in order to feel free to grow. I want him to see by my actions that the gospel of Jesus Christ is really wonderful, sweet, and exciting.”
Contrast this with the woman who uses bitterness, anger, hopelessness, and the spirit of contention as her tools of persuasion. In her frustration to have things right, she displays an example of what the gospel of Jesus Christ is not—pushing her husband further away and leaving him without a taste of its goodness.
Satan would thwart us in our attempts to influence with love, for it is truly our most powerful tool. He would have us be contentious and exercise coercion. He would have us neglect our own spiritual nourishment—prayer, fasting, study—for a fury of impatience. He would have us be as the Pharisees, nit-picking over practices and forgetting principles.
It is right, for example, to have family home evenings. But it is not right for a wife to force her husband, through embarrassment, into this practice. There are times when wives of inactive or nonmember husbands must be content to leave part of the law undone and patiently wait for their husbands to lead the way. In such cases, the “weightier matters of the law” (Matt. 23:23) need not be left undone—for these are the gifts of the Spirit, which will help a wife “have no more disposition to do evil [nag, preach, judge], but to do good continually” to her husband. (see Mosiah 5:2).
We have all probably experienced being caught up in the spirit of a meeting and enjoying the feelings of warmth and love. As we drive home, the feeling lingers. The whole world looks different—filled with love, excitement, and promise. The same children whose prattlings may have disturbed us on the way to the meeting now seem to glow with angelic countenance.
Such is the influence of the Spirit, which is love, peace, and joy. We should plead for this influence daily. Only with it are we able to overcome and block Satan’s efforts to destroy our marriages.
One woman came up to me in tears after Relief Society one day and said, “I’m about ready to give up on him. I thought a year would bring some changes, but he’s no more ready to become active than he was last year. I feel like the Lord has failed me. Why should I keep trying if he’ll never change?”
After listening and searching for understanding, I asked, “You say you are still trying. Have you been devoting yourself to your own spiritual nourishment lately, as you were a year ago when you felt such promise for the relationship?”
“No,” she answered, “I haven’t felt like praying, and with moving to another home, I haven’t felt like I’ve had time for studying.”
“Well,” I confided, “I know that when I begin to lose faith in my husband and in our relationship, or when I start to become critical, I find that I have been starving my own spirit. But as I begin to restore a sweet spirit within me, I see my husband with new faith and love.”
A few weeks later, this woman called to tell me that through recommitting herself to a program of spiritual feedings, she once again had hope in her husband and in their marriage. She said, “I was wrong. There has been a change in him. It is so slight that I had overlooked it before.”
Each week when we partake of the bread and water in remembrance of the Savior, we are given the promise that if we keep his commandments, we will have his Spirit to be with us. And with his Spirit, spouses may know how best to truly be a help and a strength to each other.
Notes

Mollie H. Sorensen, mother of ten and a 1982 graduate of Brigham Young University, teaches Sunday School in her Napa, California, ward.

Thursday, October 16, 2008

Week 39: Happiness, Your Heritage

When I heard this talk I KNEW that I had to share it with each of you again! I have never taken so many notes on a conference talk in my life. I had been personally praying to know more deeply of God’s love for me and to feel more happiness and joy in my life. This beautiful talk spoke right to my spirit. I felt so uplifted and I know that you will too! Truly happiness is our heritage and our birthright! May you find joy in creating! May you feel your weariness lifted to such a degree that His pure light fills you to overflowing. There is so much we can give when we are filled ourselves!

Have a truly blessed week!

~Sarah
Happiness, Your Heritage
President Dieter F. Uchtdorf Second Counselor in the First Presidency
Our birthright—and the purpose of our great voyage on this earth—is to seek and experience eternal happiness.

My dear sisters, I am grateful for this, my first opportunity to speak to the women of the Church gathered together in all parts of the world. We are especially honored today with the presence of President Monson and President Eyring. The choir has touched our hearts. We have been inspired by the messages of Sister Thompson, Sister Allred, and Sister Beck.
Since learning that I would be with you today, I have thought about the many women who have shaped my life: my wonderful wife, Harriet; my mother; my mother-in-law; my sister; my daughter; my daughter-in-law; and many friends. All my life I have been surrounded by women who inspired, taught, and encouraged me. I am who I am today in large part because of these singular women. Each time I meet with the sisters of the Church, I sense that I am in the midst of similar remarkable souls. I am grateful to be here, grateful for your talents, compassion, and service. Most of all, I am grateful for who you are: treasured daughters of our Heavenly Father with infinite worth.
I’m sure it comes as no surprise, but the differences between men and women can often be quite striking—physically and mentally, as well as emotionally. One of the best ways I can think of to illustrate this is in the way my wife and I cook a meal.
When Harriet prepares a meal, it’s a masterpiece. Her cuisine is as wide-ranging as the world, and she frequently prepares dishes from countries we have visited. The presentation of the food is awe inspiring. In fact, it often looks so beautiful that it seems a crime to eat it. It’s as much a feast for the eyes as it is for the sense of taste.
But sure enough, no matter how perfect everything is, looks, and tastes, Harriet will apologize for something she thinks is imperfect. “I’m afraid I used a touch too much ginger,” she will say, or, “Next time, I think it would be better if I used a little more curry and one additional bay leaf.”
Let me contrast that with the way I cook. For the purpose of this talk, I asked Harriet to tell me what I cook best.
Her answer: fried eggs.
Sunny-side up.
But that isn’t all. I have a specialty dish called Knusperchen. The name may sound like a delicacy you might find at an exclusive restaurant. Let me share with you how to make it. You cut French bread into small slices and toast them twice.
That is the recipe!
So, between fried eggs, even when they are greasy, and Knusperchen, even when they are burned, when I cook, I feel pretty heroic.
Perhaps this contrast between my wife and me is a slight exaggeration, but it illustrates something that may extend beyond preparing meals.
To me it appears that our splendid sisters sometimes undervalue their abilities—they focus on what is lacking or imperfect rather than what has been accomplished and who they really are.
Perhaps you recognize this trait in someone you know really well.
The good news is that this also points to an admirable quality: the innate desire to please the Lord to the best of your ability. Unfortunately, it can also lead to frustration, exhaustion, and unhappiness.
To All Who Are Weary
Today I would like to speak to those who have ever felt inadequate, discouraged, or weary—in short, I would like to speak to all of us.
I also pray that the Holy Ghost will amplify my words and bestow upon them additional meaning, insight, and inspiration.
We know that sometimes it can be difficult to keep our heads above water. In fact, in our world of change, challenges, and checklists, sometimes it can seem nearly impossible to avoid feeling overwhelmed by emotions of suffering and sorrow.
I am not suggesting that we can simply flip a switch and stop the negative feelings that distress us. This isn’t a pep talk or an attempt to encourage those sinking in quicksand to imagine instead they are relaxing on a beach. I recognize that in all of our lives there are real concerns. I know there are hearts here today that harbor deep sorrows. Others wrestle with fears that trouble the soul. For some, loneliness is their secret trial.
These things are not insignificant.
However, I would like to speak about two principles that may help you find a path to peace, hope, and joy—even during times of trial and distress. I want to speak about God’s happiness and how each one of us can taste of it in spite of the burdens that beset us.
God’s Happiness
Let me first pose a question: What do you suppose is the greatest kind of happiness possible? For me, the answer to this question is, God’s happiness.
This leads to another question: What is our Heavenly Father’s happiness?
This may be impossible to answer because His ways are not our ways. “For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are [God’s] ways higher than [our] ways, and [His] thoughts [higher] than [our] thoughts.”1
Though we cannot understand “the meaning of all things,” we do “know that [God] loveth his children”2 because He has said, “Behold, this is my work and my glory—to bring to pass the immortality and eternal life of man.”3
Heavenly Father is able to accomplish these two great goals—the immortality and eternal life of man—because He is a God of creation and compassion. Creating and being compassionate are two objectives that contribute to our Heavenly Father’s perfect happiness. Creating and being compassionate are two activities that we as His spirit children can and should emulate.
The Work of Creation
The desire to create is one of the deepest yearnings of the human soul. No matter our talents, education, backgrounds, or abilities, we each have an inherent wish to create something that did not exist before.
Everyone can create. You don’t need money, position, or influence in order to create something of substance or beauty.
Creation brings deep satisfaction and fulfillment. We develop ourselves and others when we take unorganized matter into our hands and mold it into something of beauty—and I am not talking about the process of cleaning the rooms of your teenage children.
You might say, “I’m not the creative type. When I sing, I’m always half a tone above or below the note. I cannot draw a line without a ruler. And the only practical use for my homemade bread is as a paperweight or as a doorstop.”
If that is how you feel, think again, and remember that you are spirit daughters of the most creative Being in the universe. Isn’t it remarkable to think that your very spirits are fashioned by an endlessly creative and eternally compassionate God? Think about it—your spirit body is a masterpiece, created with a beauty, function, and capacity beyond imagination.
But to what end were we created? We were created with the express purpose and potential of experiencing a fulness of joy.4 Our birthright—and the purpose of our great voyage on this earth—is to seek and experience eternal happiness. One of the ways we find this is by creating things.
If you are a mother, you participate with God in His work of creation—not only by providing physical bodies for your children but also by teaching and nurturing them. If you are not a mother now, the creative talents you develop will prepare you for that day, in this life or the next.
You may think you don’t have talents, but that is a false assumption, for we all have talents and gifts, every one of us.5 The bounds of creativity extend far beyond the limits of a canvas or a sheet of paper and do not require a brush, a pen, or the keys of a piano. Creation means bringing into existence something that did not exist before—colorful gardens, harmonious homes, family memories, flowing laughter.
What you create doesn’t have to be perfect. So what if the eggs are greasy or the toast is burned? Don’t let fear of failure discourage you. Don’t let the voice of critics paralyze you—whether that voice comes from the outside or the inside.
If you still feel incapable of creating, start small. Try to see how many smiles you can create, write a letter of appreciation, learn a new skill, identify a space and beautify it.
Nearly a century and a half ago, President Brigham Young spoke to the Saints of his day. “There is a great work for the Saints to do,” he said. “Progress, and improve upon and make beautiful everything around you. Cultivate the earth, and cultivate your minds. Build cities, adorn your habitations, make gardens, orchards, and vineyards, and render the earth so pleasant that when you look upon your labors you may do so with pleasure, and that angels may delight to come and visit your beautiful locations. In the mean time continually seek to adorn your minds with all the graces of the Spirit of Christ.”6
The more you trust and rely upon the Spirit, the greater your capacity to create. That is your opportunity in this life and your destiny in the life to come. Sisters, trust and rely on the Spirit. As you take the normal opportunities of your daily life and create something of beauty and helpfulness, you improve not only the world around you but also the world within you.
Being Compassionate
Being compassionate is another great work of our Heavenly Father and a fundamental characteristic of who we are as a people. We are commanded to “succor the weak, lift up the hands which hang down, and strengthen the feeble knees.”7 Disciples of Christ throughout all ages of the world have been distinguished by their compassion. Those who follow the Savior “mourn with those that mourn . . . and comfort those that stand in need of comfort.”8
When we reach out to bless the lives of others, our lives are blessed as well. Service and sacrifice open the windows of heaven, allowing choice blessings to descend upon us. Surely our beloved Heavenly Father smiles upon those who care for the least of His children.
As we lift others, we rise a little higher ourselves. President Spencer W. Kimball taught, “The more we serve our fellowmen in appropriate ways, the more substance there is to our souls.”9
President Gordon B. Hinckley believed in the healing power of service. After the death of his wife, he provided a great example to the Church in the way he immersed himself in work and in serving others. It is told that President Hinckley remarked to one woman who had recently lost her husband, “Work will cure your grief. Serve others.”
These are profound words. As we lose ourselves in the service of others, we discover our own lives and our own happiness.
President Lorenzo Snow expressed a similar thought: “When you find yourselves a little gloomy, look around you and find somebody that is in a worse plight than yourself; go to him and find out what the trouble is, then try to remove it with the wisdom which the Lord bestows upon you; and the first thing you know, your gloom is gone, you feel light, the Spirit of the Lord is upon you, and everything seems illuminated.”10
In today’s world of pop psychology, junk TV, and feel-good self-help manuals, this advice may seem counterintuitive. We are sometimes told that the answer to our ills is to look inward, to indulge ourselves, to spend first and pay later, and to satisfy our own desires even at the expense of those around us. While there are times when it is prudent to look first to our own needs, in the long run it doesn’t lead to lasting happiness.
An Instrument in the Hands of the Lord
I believe that the women of the Church, regardless of age or family status, understand and apply best the words of James Barrie, the author of Peter Pan: “Those who bring sunshine to the lives of others cannot keep it from themselves.”11 Often I have witnessed quiet acts of kindness and compassion by noble women who extended themselves in unselfish charity. My heart swells when I hear stories of the sisters of the Church and how they rush to the aid of those in need.
There are those in the Church—both men and women—who wonder how they can contribute to the kingdom. Sometimes women who are single, divorced, or widowed wonder if there is a place for them. Every sister in the Church is of critical importance—not only to our Heavenly Father but also to the building of the kingdom of God as well. There is a great work to do.
One year ago in this meeting, President Monson taught that “you are . . . surrounded by opportunities for service. . . . Often small acts of service are all that is required to lift and bless another.”12 Look around you. There at sacrament meeting is a young mother with several children—offer to sit with her and help. There in your neighborhood is a young man who seems discouraged—tell him you enjoy being in his presence, that you feel his goodness. True words of encouragement require only a loving and caring heart but may have an eternal impact on the life of those around you.
You wonderful sisters render compassionate service to others for reasons that supersede desires for personal benefits. In this you emulate the Savior, who, though a king, did not seek position, nor was He concerned about whether others noticed Him. He did not bother to compete with others. His thoughts were always tuned to help others. He taught, healed, conversed, and listened to others. He knew that greatness had little to do with outward signs of prosperity or position. He taught and lived by this doctrine: “He that is greatest among you shall be your servant.”13
In the end, the number of prayers we say may contribute to our happiness, but the number of prayers we answer may be of even greater importance. Let us open our eyes and see the heavy hearts, notice the loneliness and despair; let us feel the silent prayers of others around us, and let us be an instrument in the hands of the Lord to answer those prayers.
Conclusion
My dear sisters, I have a simple faith. I believe that as you are faithful and diligent in keeping the commandments of God, as you draw closer to Him in faith, hope, and charity, things will work together for your good.14 I believe that as you immerse yourselves in the work of our Father—as you create beauty and as you are compassionate to others—God will encircle you in the arms of His love.15 Discouragement, inadequacy, and weariness will give way to a life of meaning, grace, and fulfillment.
As spirit daughters of our Heavenly Father, happiness is your heritage.
You are choice daughters of our Heavenly Father, and through the things you create and by your compassionate service, you are a great power for good. You will make the world a better place. Lift up your chin; walk tall. God loves you. We love and admire you.
Of this I testify, and leave you my blessing as an Apostle of the Lord, in the name of Jesus Christ, amen.
NOTES1. Isaiah 55:9.2. 1 Nephi 11:17.3. Moses 1:39.4. See 2 Nephi 2:25.5. See D&C 46:11–12.6. Brigham Young, Deseret News, Aug. 8, 1860, 177.7. D&C 81:5.8. Mosiah 18:9.9. Spencer W. Kimball, The Teachings of Spencer W. Kimball, ed. Edward L. Kimball (1982), 254.10. Lorenzo Snow, in Conference Report, Apr. 6, 1899, 2–3.11. Barrie, J. M., A Window in Thrums (1917), 137.12. Thomas S. Monson, “Three Goals to Guide You,” Ensign, Nov. 2007, 120.13. Matthew 23:11.14. See D&C 90:24.15. See D&C 6:20.